I read Emergiblog (get the updates sent to my email) and this mornings was a hoot! Kim was very insightful and creative as she compared NASCAR to the ER. Way to go, Kim!!
I, too, have become a Nascar fan. I remember seeing some of the races as a teenager/ young adult, but it never caught my fancy until Jeff Gordon won back-to-back championships and was a good sportsman. He's still my favorite driver and I hope his engineering team gets his cars back to the front--hard to win if your car just can't keep up.
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Ever been absolutely stumped by a situation? Feel like giving up? Like all your effort went for nothing? Try raising a son with Asperger's Syndrome! Mine is now 19 (20 in May), but he is emotionally much younger and freaking out about his options in the coming months. We were -- maybe still are -- going to get him set up with Social Services so he could finish school here in VA while I go on down to FL with the rest of the family. But he is starting to come unraveled on me. He has missed 27 days of school (was diagnosed as recovering from Mono) and is in danger of destroying all the things lined up for him. I think the pressure of being here without me as support is undermining him. But what can I do? I CAN NOT stay in VA for another year without my husband and minor son! One whole year is more than enough, but I also don't know what to do!
Thursday we have a big meeting with Social Services, so maybe some answers will come from that.
Life Lesson? Hang on!!! A solution will be found, maybe not the one you thought or wanted, but a solution none the less.
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Monday, February 19, 2007
Changes, Changes, and More Changes
The further I go in this life, the more I am aware of how everything changes! And changes! And changes!
I have never had a stable assignment at work--always filling in for a vacant position, covering vacations, etc. Well, it looks like I will finally get one April 1st! Doing all UR, not Case Management. The company is looking to increase the amount of time done in Case Management, so they are splitting the two responsibilities and most will do true Case Management and I (plus a few choice others) will be doing strictly UR. Now don't get me wrong--I volunteered for the position because I will be leaving for Florida in the summer. I couldn't see getting so involved in so many lives and then just up and leaving. Plus, since I have both Behavioral Health and Medical experience, I can cover the UR for both if need be.
Of course, when I leave, that will be more changing. And it's unclear what I will be doing after I get to FL. If my husband is doing well enough in his job, I may actually take some time to be a housewife and Mom. Oh Happy Day!!!! If not, well I'll be doing some kind of nursing, hopefully in Case Management.
Anyway, Life Lesson for today: Never, ever get too comfortable with how things are--they are bound to change. Is it awful? It will get better. Is it wonderful? It will get worse. Life is full of ups and downs, but one thing is constant--the deep, abiding love of God. He never changes, is always there, knows all our secret hurts, desires, sins--AND LOVES US ANYWAY!!!!!
I have never had a stable assignment at work--always filling in for a vacant position, covering vacations, etc. Well, it looks like I will finally get one April 1st! Doing all UR, not Case Management. The company is looking to increase the amount of time done in Case Management, so they are splitting the two responsibilities and most will do true Case Management and I (plus a few choice others) will be doing strictly UR. Now don't get me wrong--I volunteered for the position because I will be leaving for Florida in the summer. I couldn't see getting so involved in so many lives and then just up and leaving. Plus, since I have both Behavioral Health and Medical experience, I can cover the UR for both if need be.
Of course, when I leave, that will be more changing. And it's unclear what I will be doing after I get to FL. If my husband is doing well enough in his job, I may actually take some time to be a housewife and Mom. Oh Happy Day!!!! If not, well I'll be doing some kind of nursing, hopefully in Case Management.
Anyway, Life Lesson for today: Never, ever get too comfortable with how things are--they are bound to change. Is it awful? It will get better. Is it wonderful? It will get worse. Life is full of ups and downs, but one thing is constant--the deep, abiding love of God. He never changes, is always there, knows all our secret hurts, desires, sins--AND LOVES US ANYWAY!!!!!
Friday, February 9, 2007
CATCHING UP
SABAN TO THE RESCUE.....
Well, not too bad. The #10 recruiting class in the country in one month! Now let's see what he can do with what he got.
ROLL TIDE, ROLL!!!!
*****************************
Just FYI:
You do NOT want to get the NoroVirus! I spent 3 days in misery and another week+ recovering my strength. Wash your hands and pray, because I found out it only takes 10 virus particles to get you!!
*****************************
TO ABSTAIN OR NOT................
Remember how your mom (or grandma) always said to keep your knees together? Maybe they weren't so crazy after all. We have a problem in our culture. We expect the girls to be the keepers of the purity (she's a slut if she doesn't!), we expect the boys to "sew wild oats" (with whom if the girls stay virgins?), and we have no safeguards to slow raging hormones down (are you a prude, sissy, baby, etc?)
In fact, we've had this problem brewing for years--remember WWII? Lots of our guys had shotgun weddings in Britain. See, American guys expected the girls to say no. English girls expected the guys to have control and say no. Guess what? No one said no! Enough of this aside. (Wouldn't it have been better if everyone expected both boys and girls to say "No"!)
What was my experience? Well, my introduction into the wonders of impending womanhood was my mother ordered a couple of booklets from Kotex and handed them to me. That was it! No advice, no warnings, just a booklet that told me about "the birds and the bees". I hadn't had a period yet, so when she asked, of course I had no questions. And that was the end of the subject. Not much protection for the innocent with the wolves circling.
The first guy I dated took me down the proverbial garden path. Just for the record--I had said "no" three times the night he took my virginity. (Isn't that now classified as Date-Rape?) And he had the gall to tell me he hadn't believed that I was a virgin! I still remember how the sky looked different as we walked back to my door--must have been like Adam and Eve after they ate the fruit and saw everything differently.
What was the result? I didn't know what were appropriate boundaries. This led to much heartache and anguish. How I wish I had been told what I told my boys!
Now, don't get me wrong, I knew right from wrong. I had been in Sunday school and read the Bible, but that just doesn't substitute for an adult sitting down as many times as it takes while a child is growing up to answer questions, give warnings, and tell the absolute truth at the level the child is at. So for any girl, or boy, out there who wants to know the truth, here it is:
1. You can get pregnant or get a disease the first time. (Don't forget guys, you are responsible for that baby, too.) In fact, a girl can get pregnant without actual intercourse--just get the semen close and those little sperm will swim right on in! (This has happened!) One documented case of AIDS was the result of one experience to "try it out" 10 years before the diagnosis--can you imagine being 26 and finding out the one time you "did it" was going to kill you?
2. You give a part of your heart to anyone you have sex with. Why do you think it hurts so much when you have a breakup? How much of your heart do you want to have to give to the one you finally marry? All of it, or a patched up, beat up imitation of the one you started out with? I truly wish I had been a virgin on my wedding night. I would not have had the emotional scars and pain left over from the fiance' in college or others.
3. If you and the fiance' "do it" before you get married, it's documented you WILL have more problems than if you don't "do it" before the walk down the aisle. Plus, if someone calls it off at the last minute, you haven't crossed the line and still have the purity to give to the guy or gal you do walk down the aisle with.
I've found that when God said "Don't" do something, it wasn't to be mean or keep something good from us--it was to protect us from pain and heartache. He really does know what is best for us!
So if you're reading this and you are a virgin--STAY THAT WAY!!!! If you aren't, STOP!! I know it won't be easy, but it is possible. Get help if you need to. Make sure you aren't alone with a date for your sake and your date's. At least always be in sight of someone who would help with the saying, "No."
And if you are a parent--talk to your kids. If you don't, they will get their info from their peers. Know what that is? "Everybody does it", "Your a baby if you don't", "You can't get pregnant the first time" (same with getting diseases), etc, etc. I know you want to be a good parent, but if you don't talk to your son or daughter about this subject, you are leaving them hanging out to dry! The wolves are even more numerous and vicious than they were when we were kids--do you really want your child to have the same pain and anguish this whole issue caused you or your friends? And be honest without being graphic. They need to know what pain it caused you. Explain the good and the bad of relationships you've had and why you think they didn't work. Your kids can learn from you without experiencing the same pain, esp. if you start this early--I started when they were in elementary school only telling them what they could handle.
What has been the result? Both my boys are determined to wait for marriage. They both have had girlfriends who pressured them to "do it" and then have broken up--both boys made the connection that if they had sex with the girlfriend, it would have hurt a lot more and left a lot more baggage to deal with. They got it!!!!
Well, not too bad. The #10 recruiting class in the country in one month! Now let's see what he can do with what he got.
ROLL TIDE, ROLL!!!!
*****************************
Just FYI:
You do NOT want to get the NoroVirus! I spent 3 days in misery and another week+ recovering my strength. Wash your hands and pray, because I found out it only takes 10 virus particles to get you!!
*****************************
TO ABSTAIN OR NOT................
Remember how your mom (or grandma) always said to keep your knees together? Maybe they weren't so crazy after all. We have a problem in our culture. We expect the girls to be the keepers of the purity (she's a slut if she doesn't!), we expect the boys to "sew wild oats" (with whom if the girls stay virgins?), and we have no safeguards to slow raging hormones down (are you a prude, sissy, baby, etc?)
In fact, we've had this problem brewing for years--remember WWII? Lots of our guys had shotgun weddings in Britain. See, American guys expected the girls to say no. English girls expected the guys to have control and say no. Guess what? No one said no! Enough of this aside. (Wouldn't it have been better if everyone expected both boys and girls to say "No"!)
What was my experience? Well, my introduction into the wonders of impending womanhood was my mother ordered a couple of booklets from Kotex and handed them to me. That was it! No advice, no warnings, just a booklet that told me about "the birds and the bees". I hadn't had a period yet, so when she asked, of course I had no questions. And that was the end of the subject. Not much protection for the innocent with the wolves circling.
The first guy I dated took me down the proverbial garden path. Just for the record--I had said "no" three times the night he took my virginity. (Isn't that now classified as Date-Rape?) And he had the gall to tell me he hadn't believed that I was a virgin! I still remember how the sky looked different as we walked back to my door--must have been like Adam and Eve after they ate the fruit and saw everything differently.
What was the result? I didn't know what were appropriate boundaries. This led to much heartache and anguish. How I wish I had been told what I told my boys!
Now, don't get me wrong, I knew right from wrong. I had been in Sunday school and read the Bible, but that just doesn't substitute for an adult sitting down as many times as it takes while a child is growing up to answer questions, give warnings, and tell the absolute truth at the level the child is at. So for any girl, or boy, out there who wants to know the truth, here it is:
1. You can get pregnant or get a disease the first time. (Don't forget guys, you are responsible for that baby, too.) In fact, a girl can get pregnant without actual intercourse--just get the semen close and those little sperm will swim right on in! (This has happened!) One documented case of AIDS was the result of one experience to "try it out" 10 years before the diagnosis--can you imagine being 26 and finding out the one time you "did it" was going to kill you?
2. You give a part of your heart to anyone you have sex with. Why do you think it hurts so much when you have a breakup? How much of your heart do you want to have to give to the one you finally marry? All of it, or a patched up, beat up imitation of the one you started out with? I truly wish I had been a virgin on my wedding night. I would not have had the emotional scars and pain left over from the fiance' in college or others.
3. If you and the fiance' "do it" before you get married, it's documented you WILL have more problems than if you don't "do it" before the walk down the aisle. Plus, if someone calls it off at the last minute, you haven't crossed the line and still have the purity to give to the guy or gal you do walk down the aisle with.
I've found that when God said "Don't" do something, it wasn't to be mean or keep something good from us--it was to protect us from pain and heartache. He really does know what is best for us!
So if you're reading this and you are a virgin--STAY THAT WAY!!!! If you aren't, STOP!! I know it won't be easy, but it is possible. Get help if you need to. Make sure you aren't alone with a date for your sake and your date's. At least always be in sight of someone who would help with the saying, "No."
And if you are a parent--talk to your kids. If you don't, they will get their info from their peers. Know what that is? "Everybody does it", "Your a baby if you don't", "You can't get pregnant the first time" (same with getting diseases), etc, etc. I know you want to be a good parent, but if you don't talk to your son or daughter about this subject, you are leaving them hanging out to dry! The wolves are even more numerous and vicious than they were when we were kids--do you really want your child to have the same pain and anguish this whole issue caused you or your friends? And be honest without being graphic. They need to know what pain it caused you. Explain the good and the bad of relationships you've had and why you think they didn't work. Your kids can learn from you without experiencing the same pain, esp. if you start this early--I started when they were in elementary school only telling them what they could handle.
What has been the result? Both my boys are determined to wait for marriage. They both have had girlfriends who pressured them to "do it" and then have broken up--both boys made the connection that if they had sex with the girlfriend, it would have hurt a lot more and left a lot more baggage to deal with. They got it!!!!
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